My first "race" in 7 years

Sounds weird, but even though I have been participating in races and triathlons the last 8 years, yesterday was the first time I truly raced in a long, long time. I went out with the intent of running as fast as I could, pushing my body as far as I could and leaving it all out there. As much as I have wanted to do this over the past year+, I think there was something mentally holding me back... and I know what it is: the fear of failure. And it stems from my past.

Shortly after I got into endurance running, I was training for a spring marathon-- this is when we lived in Milwaukee, pre-kids. I trained a lot in the Petite Center (indoor arena) and I was putting up some mad, crazy, fast numbers (for me). It got my hopes up (high) for my upcoming marathon. So when said marathon came along, I went out quick, strong and way, way too fast. I hadn't taken into account that my training in an indoor arena would not equate to running a race in the wind, with hills, etc. and I bonked. Hard. I hated the race. Had the worst second half (probably to date) and never wanted to do that again. What I disliked more than the race was the feeling I felt of failure. I hadn't met my time goal I set out for myself.

Since, I have run numerous races and triathlons, but all with the intent on "finishing". I started choosing my goals not by how fast I could complete something, but just getting it done. While this is a worthy goal, I think I have decided it is time to push myself a little harder.

So that was what the Pueblo Half Marathon was about. I have been training my endurance for the last year and lately have been working on speed as well. I wanted to put the two together and see how I could pull it off. And I did.

The half itself was a beautiful run. You run two laps around the zoo (2 miles), then head out on a trail along the river. It was a rolling course, not bad at all. A little more downhill on the way out and uphill on the way back.

As for how I raced, normally I settle into what I know I can comfortably hold and then try to pick it up at the end. Today, I settled into what I thought was my limit, with the intent of pushing myself even harder at the end. So, with that in mind, I went. I went and went and went. The miles ticked by and I just tried to keep pushing myself, while also being smart about it.

Along the route, you hit mile 8, circle around a dam and head back to the start. It was about there I tried to pick it up a little more. I can do 5 miles of this, I thought. By mile 9 I realized that the "pack" was thinning out. In fact, it was really thin. And, on top of that, there were even fewer women out there. Hmm... I may just be doing ok in this race.

Mile 9.5 a guy passed me. This was weird to me and I realized no one had passed me yet, I had been doing all the passing. While I was happy to make this realization, I noted what that guy looked like and kept going at my pace.

As the miles got to the end, I just kept pushing harder and harder. I had the women in my sites and just kept picking them off one by one. This got hard, since there were fewer women and farther apart. I got to a point where I saw no more women, so I shot for trying to pass men. This worked and I just kept feeling stronger. At the very end, I spotted the guy who passed me at 9.5 miles. He heard me coming (the breathing) and he picked it up. I didn't think I could hang with him so I hung back. About 200 m to go though, I felt the adrenaline and I kicked it to the end, passing him. We congratulated each other on a great race, I stretched and headed for a cool-down run.

OK, I'll say it: I was pretty proud of myself. For once, I put it all out there. Fear of failure, fear of bonking, fear of not being able to meet my time goals-- I overcame them all this day. I know that this won't always be the case. There will be days when I fall short, there will be races when I DO bonk, there will be times when it doesn't go so well and I need to use those as learning experiences, not deterrents to my goals.

How did I finish? 1:45:25. 5th place in my age group. 21st women overall. That is pretty good for me. Really, the stats don't mean so much to me as the fact that I know I couldn't have done any better, and that is all I can ask for myself.

The weight issue

I have been wanting to write this blog for awhile, but it is a hard blog to write. Why? The issue is weight.
- Weight is a sensitive topic to write about.
- Weight is also a very personal topic to write about.

In the past year, I slimmed down for Ironman. Of course I wanted to shed pounds (who doesn't), but the funny thing is I barely lost any weight. That may surprise some of you, since IM training requires A LOT of endurance and, thus, burns A LOT of calories. But, also to be able to train that hard, you intake a lot of calories and you have to develop muscle. Despite the fact that I didn't lose that much weight, here were the changes.

October 2009 - October 2010

What? How could I have not lost much weight? I think you can agree I am more toned in the picture on the right. And we have all heard that muscle weighs more than fat, well, this illustrates it.

Now, I am not posting this as a "look how much I changed" post, there is a larger point to this, so please bear with me. I, like many of my friends, have often looked to the scale to give me results. The pounds are what we count because they are concrete. A sure way to measure our "success". But "losing weight" isn't always what makes us healthier people. You can shed pounds and it may not be what is better for you in the long run. It also may not give you the results you want.

So, how could I have basically stayed the same over this past year? When you strengthen your muscles, the muscle fibers are actually woven closer together, thus creating a heavier, denser muscle. While this can make you gain weight on the scale, with your muscle fibers woven more tightly together, you are actually slimming down. If you, in addition, are at a calorie deficit, you will probably maintain your weight (as I did). If you are not at a calorie deficit, you will gain. This often discourages people and they give up-- don't let it! If I had been doing an Ironman with the intent to lose weight, I would have felt like a failure. But, if you look at my body changes, I believe it was a success!

My point: Sometimes you have to look beyond the scale to see the real success.

And folks, there's more:
Since IM, I have been still been training, although it with a stronger focus on running. While I have been keeping up on my strength training, I do want to shed some pounds (for the lightness factor) in running. This has resulted in another 6 lb. loss.
Although the pound for pound weight loss is the same, I think we can all agree the first 6 lb. 'transformation' is much more substantial. I say this, again, not as a "look at me" post, but to illustrate that sometimes when you are losing weight just to lose weight, it shows but not as much as when you are working hard to improve your overall health and fitness.

My second point: While the end result on the scale is the same, the end result in your body can be much different.

So, here I am, 12 lbs down-- do I feel any different? I feel healthier. I feel lighter when I run and exercise. On top of that, I feel stronger. While in the past I have worried about the scale, I think especially as I grow (gulp) older, I am doing it more for my health than my body image. And I think it is a good thing.

Surprising note (at least to me): By industry standards, I am still classified as overweight. Another reason not to live your life by the scale.

Where the buffaloes roam...

So, I am sorry I have been a little sidetracked and not paying too much attention to this little old bloggity blog. I have been thinking about "things" to write about, but really what I want to write about are those things that get me excited, so here is the latest:

Anyways, so went on running last weekend with friends up at Lair 'o the Bear. Had a great time, even saw some elk.Which got me even more juiced than ever to run the Moab Red Hot 50k in February... till I went to register that night... and it was FULL!

Yep, that's right. FULL. No entry. Nada. Nothing. I emailed the race director and he said I was SOL (in a nice way), so I didn't beg and went to work assessing "what am I gonna do now"??? I was counting on Moab to be a good long distance training run with plenty of climbing to make it good training for Comrades. (Not to mention I would be with friends and it was within driving distance!)

So, I looked and looked. Considered Croom's again (always fun to see mom), but didn't want to do Florida twice this winter. Plus, no real climbing. And then I remembered a run I was considering for my first 50 last year, but thought it may be too hard for my first 50-- The Buffalo Run on Antelope Island.

Hmmm. A run on an island. Sounds pretty flat. Till you look at the run map.

OK, so maybe a little daunting. I emailed the race director who said "it only had about 5,000 ft climbing". (Moab has 4,860.) Sounds challenging to me. Maybe even a better fit than Moab... NO!

So... as if that wasn't enough, here's where I get to run:

Isn't that gorgeous?

Runner's World even featured it as a Rave Run!

For those of you who know me, there are a few adjectives you can use to get me to run something, those are "beautiful" and "challenging"-- so I think I am gonna LOVE this!

For anyone interested in joining me, check the race out here. Can't wait!

Vision Board

At the risk of sounding like a complete dork, today I made my first vision board.

A vision board (also called a Treasure Map or a Visual Explorer or Creativity Collage) is typically a poster board on which you paste or collage images that you’ve torn out from various magazines. It’s simple.

The idea behind this is that when you surround yourself with images of who you want to become, what you want to have, where you want to live, or where you want to vacation, your life changes to match those images and those desires.

In preparing for Comrades next spring, I have found myself with a long journey and one in which I have Comrades as the ultimate goal, but other goals to hit along the way to help enhance the journey and to help me complete Comrades to the best of my ability.

Usually, I stay pretty motivated just without any visual cues. Occasionally, I will hang something up on my bulletin board to remind me of what I am shooting for. Usually a race brochure or race profile. For Ironman, I just had the mental image of me crossing the finish line to keep me going.

This goal, I decided that one image wasn't enough. So I got out my magazines, my scissors, some pictures and little rubber cement and started creating.

So, here's what I came up with:

If you didn't get it from the pictures:
To prepare for Comrades, I am running the Miami Marathon-- where I hope to pr. Additionally, I want to focus on my health: drink more water, strengthen my core, trim down, go faster, etc. I wanted to remember my friends who will be with me in Miami and Durban, Becki and Heather. Watching Heather get her BQ-- and see how close I can get to one... In February, I want to run the Moab Red Hot 50k as a distance measure, so I wanted some Moab picts. And of course, I wanted to highlight Comrades with symbols of their race and everything I can't WAIT to experience in South Africa (Durban, animals and African culture).

I hoped to capture it all and I think that I have (for me). I finished it and hung it up in my office where I will see it every day and already it has helped. I can't wait to go running in the morning. I hope this feeling stays with me and I hope the board is a constant reminder of all that I am shooting for.

Call me a dork or call me motivated. I don't care. :)

Time to give back a little....

For the past year (actually longer) I have been reaping the benefits of friend's and volunteer's support. While I like to give back when I can, it is hard for me to sometimes find those opportunities that I can do with kids, family, etc.-- but not this weekend!

This weekend was the Rock'n Roll Denver 1/2 and full marathon and I had 3 friends running one of the races. (Not to mention the kids, who ran here.) It was much easier to involve the kids and Ross in the festivities since they, too, were friends with everyone. For support, we made t-shirts, signs, etc. so that the kids felt included and could do their part to cheer everyone on.

This is Noah's onesie. It says "See Daddy Run 13.1! GO DADDY!"

"The Dana, Chuck, Gaye OFFICIAL Cheer Crew!"

So, I started the day off at 5:00 a.m. waiting for Dana to pick me up.

Then it was off to get Chuck and go downtown. Once we were there, I made sure my race buddies were good to go and I was off to the first volunteer station (about 1 mile jog).

Ready to run!

Here we spent time stacking cups, filling water, etc. all while waiting for 15,000+ runners to pass on through. This was a really cool opportunity for me because I was volunteering at the Runner's Roost station (my local running store) that was partnered with my Tri Club, so I was happy to see everyone.

Sean, Elizabeth and a lotta, lotta Cytomax.

Once the runners started coming through, it was all business! I have never seen so many people in such a short amount of time (15,000 over about 45 minutes) race on through. It looked something like this.

The cool thing about the first stop is that it is over fast. When the runners were all done, we quickly cleaned up and I was outta there by 8:05. Then, I was running to mile 5 (about 3 miles away) to meet Ross and Dan (Dana's husband) and all of our kids.

Got there to find that Gaye, Chuck and Dana had already passed by. That was ok, I was glad everyone was having a good race! I could tell the men had their hands full with the kids (who wouldn't?), so I kind of anticipated I wouldn't be running too long with anyone (unless it was Gaye later when the kids went home).

At this time, Lorynne showed up and we all moved to mile 9.5-- two blocks away-- just in time to see Chuck pass.
So, then Lorynne, Braden and Noah were off to the finish line.

Shortly after Gaye came by

I got to see her and run with her a little.

She was doing awesome!

The kids did their jobs blowing horns and holding signs!

Then Dana came by and you can see how her face lit up when she saw her family and friends and it made being out there all the much more worthwhile!!!

I got to run a little with her, too.

Then, we were all off to the finish line... (a complete MADHOUSE with spectators for 15,000 people all in one place)

We got on the wrong side of the corral, but were still able to see Dana pass.

Chuck had finished, we found Dana at the family reunion meeting spot, but with 4 tired kids, we were unable to find Chuck & Company, but we got some good finish line photos of the Grotes.

I tried to text Gaye's friend, only to find I didn't save her number properly. I was bummed and waited for Lyndsey to text me, but nothing. So, I headed home with my clan to cyber stalk Gaye's finish.

Picture I pulled off the internet of Gaye finishing. That's my girl!

I was so happy to be out there supporting. I know it pales in comparison to all of the support I have received, but it was the least we could do.

I STRONGLY encourage anyone with friends, family, co-workers, etc who participate in these types of events, to spectate-- it makes all the difference in the world to a lot of them. And often, you make a difference in those you don't know as well. (In IM, one of the coolest signs I saw said, "I am a COMPLETE STRANGER and I am proud of you".)

Plus, you get to see some pretty cool and fun stuff. I'll leave you with some pictures of some fun runners. :)

Denver KIDS ROCK!!! Race Report

After a year of us racing, it was time for Hunter and Lincoln to strut their stuff... and boy were they excited.

We signed them up for Kids Rock Denver, which is the kid's race associated with the Rock'n Roll Denver Marathon and Half-Marathon. For the last month the kids have been talking about it a lot. At first, they thought it was a swim, bike, run race and their little hearts were let down learning they "only" got to run. But we promised them a kid's tri next year-- to which Hunter asked, "But, mom, who will coach me?" Me, of course.

To make the kid's have an extra-special race, I made them each t-shirts that said, "Cheer for me, I am (kid's name)". I got this idea from a tri-friend who said her mom did it for her and it always lifted her spirits to have people cheering for her by name. So, here are our little athletes, showing off their shirts and smiles.

Once we heard that the "kindergarten division" was ready, they grouped the kids and had a little organized stretching.

The volunteers did a great job at keeping the kid's occupied and lining them up at the start line.

Ronald greeting the kids at the start line!

All the "kindergartner division" ready to go!

Then it was time to run.

The gun goes off-- actually, they just said "go!"

Brendan, Hunter and Lincoln run by!

The race was 1/2 mile total. They ran up the street, turned around and came back. We got some better shots of the kids coming back.

Brendan booking it back.

Run, Brenny, Run!

Determination is written all over Hunter's face.

The end is in sight for Lincoln.

Here comes TYLER!!!

And Dana and Alaina are sweeping the course!

Laney loves her fans! (Dana, too)

Once they were all done, the kids got medals and lots of nutritious goodies (sponsored by McDonalds???). We sat down in some grass, had a picnic and they played for a few awhile on this perfect "fall" day (it was in the 70's!). They LOVED the whole experience and I will say RnR puts on a pretty good kid's run.

Lincoln, Hunter, Alaina and Brendan with their medals.

Evidentally, the Denver Examiner thought our kids were pretty cute, too, and featured them in their slideshow.

Ironfan Party

So, I hinted before we left that we wanted to do something for everyone who supported us over the year... so we decided to have a party.

The party was meant to help share the experience of the day with our friends here that couldn't be there, but more importantly to THANK everyone for their support. Seriously, we have an amazing support system out here and we didn't want them to think we didn't appreciate it. Additionally, it was our way of making up for not being able to always go out late, go camping, drink, etc. due to impending workouts/races/just being plain tired this past year.

Made signs for everyone coming to the party--much like the ones that we see when racing.

And a finish line...

And a recap of our year in pictures:



And a few friends:



It was a great night, just sad I didn't take more pictures-- too much time spent gabbing, drinking and catching up! Thanks to everyone who supported us this past year and for everyone who came last night. Awesome time with great friends-- you'll never know how much it has meant to us!

It was the perfect ending to our Ironman year!